ALL OR NOTHING

Life is truly beautiful if you allow yourself to disconnect, to observe, to learn, to begin to understand why everything happens.  By no means, people, objects or situations are placed in your lap simply to be dusted off.  They’re meant to be grasped, distinguished and possibly admired—but definitely appreciated.  I’m the girl that sees the glass half full, yet assesses, and than understands why people view it otherwise.  Yeah, I’m that girl that marches to beat of her own drum—but—I love to groove to the beats that surround me.  Nevertheless, I’m a human being.  Just like you, I cry, I laugh, I smile, I dance, I love.  Just like me, you become sad.  We’re no stranger to it.  

But lately, I’ve been paying attention.  

There are highs and there are lows.  

There are times where I experience extremes highs that I feel are destined to be disrupted by sudden sadness.  When melancholy finally arrives, I feel helpless, anxious, confused, wintry.  My heart pumps, but.. it feels different.  How can an object, a heart, feel so heavy and so cool, and yet fiery and fuming like a fire pit?  Simply breathing feels like a chore, or a privilege I don’t deserve.  And if I don’t take action, I fear I could fall deeper into this dark slumber.    

But lately, I’ve been thinking.  

This feeling is a form of thanklessness, thoughtlessness—ingratitude.  

In these moments, instead of taking to time to reflect, reassess and than take action, one wallows and complains and wonders, “why is this happening to me?”  The truth is, sadness and loneliness is an emotion that will forever play a role in your life. It’s up to you to pimp it out!  Use it to your advantage.  That’s why I write when I’m sad.  Maybe, in that moment, it won’t cure the feeling, but the masterpiece that’s derived from it is far better.  It’s a golden trophy.  Begin to appreciate and become grateful for what’s dished out, what’s placed in your lap.  

You see, if you hadn’t experienced both the good and the bad, you wouldn’t be where you’re at now.   And without being where you’re at now, you won’t be where you’re destined to be in the future.  It’s hard to understand why things happen to you. I get it.  But these things aren’t meant to be understood in that moment, or even ever.  What matters most is how you deal with such a matter.  What makes you so worthy of happiness if you don’t take the responsibility and strength to handle seemingly hopeless situations?  Those moments serve as character builders.  Those moments aren’t for the weak, they’re for the strong.  A person of character and strength receives true happiness because they fought so hard during tough times.  They have a better understanding of life.  And that..that makes them beautiful.  

It took me a while to understand.  It took me a very long time to get this.  But just like that, a shift occurred. 

A shift—transformation isn’t a violent crash, but a subtle blossom.

(Source: mindofataurus, via peachsticks)